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We all have dreams, things that we are passionate about and aspire to do at some point during our lifetime. It is not always easy to know whether it is a passing fancy or a bonafide wish and desire and it is something that many of us struggle with. This is a question that I even asked myself for years and it was a process to find the answer. 

Let me tell you a secret. For a long time I had a really successful career as an architect. So how did I end up founding Life LM? 

Sometimes The Clues Are In Our Childhood 

My life’s passions were always very clear from an early age: helping others, singing, painting (really anything art related), and writing. Growing up in the US, my impression was if you are not born into a family that is financially well-off, you either follow the same path or fight through hard work to change your circumstances. I chose the latter and pursued the path of academics – a path that was more traditional, safe, in order to better guarantee my survival. 

Many times we lose focus of what we actually dream of doing, because it might be risky, because it might require us to stick our necks out and be brave. We lose and forget our dreams when we aim for the safe path and not the one that fulfils us. If you are lost on the path and not quite sure what your dream or purpose might be – start digging in your childhood. What were the things that you really loved? Do you still feel that way?

Fighting For Safety And Security

I aimed for the academic path in high school that would allow me to succeed. One that without financial support would open the doors of any college for me. I moved on to university, choosing to pursue an architectural engineering degree. I worked hard – days, nights, weekends, social life – all sacrificed for my side-job and my degree.

During this period, I was constantly asking myself, why am I doing this? Is being an architect actually going to help anyone? This was my first hint that I wasn’t meeting a need of my inner purpose. But I put my head down and continued fighting, sure that this path was the right one to survive. After university I jumped right into the career path. I was hungry to succeed as quickly as possible, I was hungry to stop living a life of poverty. It wasn’t until my career success started picking up that I could stop focusing on surviving and start thinking about how I was living. 

Not every step on the path is a bad one, or a distraction of your true purpose. Many things that happen in our life need to happen in order to wake us up to what is important and what we really want from life. Do you find yourself searching for the “why” in what you are doing?

Getting The Push

All the years that I was working, marrying myself to the drive to survive I always felt deep in my gut that this was not the path for me forever. The feeling in my gut got louder, more crushing with each passing year. I ignored it because I thought, “I worked so hard to get here, I cannot just toss it to the winds. How will I survive?” What I was still failing to recognise at the time, was that I was going against my purpose. Stuffing myself into a box and a life that didn’t belong to me. 

Each day I got up for work dreading it. It felt like having stones in my stomach. I was successful, I did a great job, what was my problem? Over time I realised that forcing myself to live this way was taking me away from the warm, caring, big hearted person I always was. Instead I was angry, resentful, hated the environment that I was in and moreover I was constantly falling ill. These kinds of patterns happen when we are not being true to ourselves. Many of us come up with metaphors of putting on a suit, wearing a mask – these are all just ways of expressing that you are forcing yourself into something that you are not. 

Where Do You Want To Be?

My story can be reflected all across the globe. Putting time and effort into a job that leaves you feeling everything other than you hoped to feel – usually out of the need for security. While security is important, it is equally important not to forget or lose what you wanted from life. According to a 2017 Gallup poll, 85% of the world’s population doesn’t like their job. That is huge. One of the biggest regrets people have in life is not pursuing the things they loved and always dreamed of doing. I cannot impress upon you enough, that you only have this life, this right now.

At the End of Your Life, Was It Everything You Wanted It To Be?

Don’t be part of that statistic – it is in your power. Imagine applying all of the energy that you do at a job you don’t like into one you do like. One that brings you joy. One that lights you up and fills you up instead of sucking you dry. 

Picture yourself for a moment at the end of your days if the life you are leading right now stays the way it is. Are you happy? Did you live a fulfilled life, do everything you dreamed of doing, have no regrets? What did living your life this way cost you in terms of mental, physical, emotional health? When I did this exercise many times before taking the leap myself, it broke my heart. It helped me recognise even more so that something needed to change. Are you recognising the same need within yourself?

Now imagine yourself at the end of your life but this time you did pursue all of your dreams. How do you feel? What did you do? Where are you? What do you stand to gain by living this way? Really take a moment to visualise and feel it just as you did before. 

Article by LAHR

Let us help you reach for the life that you want. Don’t be part of the 85%, be part of the 15% that dare to have a job that they stand behind and gives them purpose. 

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